First, the background – I did some digging and it turns out that the celebration of the modern Valentine’s Day actually has its roots in several different historical practices. It seems that the modern version of Valentine’s Day is part a Christian version of a pagan sheep-herding holiday and part romantic epic featuring a roman priest named Valentine.

Since the idea of a single ‘true’ origin of Valentine’s Day is up for grabs, let’s just settle the historical hair-splitting and say that somewhere, somehow there is a reason beyond the cards and the flowers that this day exists.

Of course in popular culture, Valentine’s Day is the holiday to celebrate the ‘magic of love’ with gifts, flowers and expensive price-fix dinners. During this time of year, popular thought is you either love Valentine’s Day because you’re with someone or you hate it because you’re alone, sad and bitter.

In fact, the Washington Post recently had an online survey of best songs for an Anti-Valentine’s Day Playlist. The categories we had to choose from feature rage, regret and revenge. This is troubling because even though I am single, I honestly don’t feel any of those things.

This illustrates what I think is really wrong with Valentine’s Day. Apparently, there is no room in the red velvet-clad halls of St. Valentine’s massive cathedral for someone who is just there; single, strong, and happy. My problem with Valentine’s Day; there is no corresponding holiday to celebrate the individual, single person.

Now, I’m not talking about a day where only single people get to celebrate. I am talking about a day which says “you know what – you’re good enough as you are without needing anything – or one – else to validate you!” Something tells me you are never going to see this happen.

The reason you’re not going to see this is that you wouldn’t need anything to celebrate it. Gifts and flowers would be contrary to the point of celebrating someone for who they are. Oh sure. It’s easy to celebrate something when you know you can buy your way into validation and that’s what’s become so successful for consumer marketers on Valentine’s Day.

Pair this with that in marketing; it’s been the very nature of our jobs to create needs. We accomplish this by making the case that you’re not good enough on your own whether it’s in business or as a consumer. Thankfully, there are companies like Dove out there that are making inroads to the very basic point that you can market a product without telling someone that if they don’t buy it, something bad is going to happen.

The trouble with Valentine’s Day isn’t its blatant consumerism and it isn’t its seeming snub of single people everywhere. The problem is the fact that it distracts us from realizing that no matter what your ’single status’ is, we should be celebrating our own individuality and not just facing off on two sides of a “single” issue.

It tough though, to sell something by openly acknowledging, “You know what, you’re good enough without our product but here’s why you should buy it anyway.” Without that burning platform of need, you actually have to sell the product on its ability to inspire your target, not just by pointing out their faults.

Be assured, marketers will still be saying “you need this because it will fix what you don’t know is wrong with you yet” for some time to come. For now though, I am going to propose we each try to, at least once, sell something by saying “you need this because its going to enhance how fabulous you are already.”

We can start with Valentine’s Day….

Folks, its time we had a holiday that says it’s ok to be who you are no matter what you own or who you’re with or not with. No Flowers. No Cards. No Dinners. Just you, and the ultimate form of affection – the quiet contentment of being yourself.

Put that on a holiday card, Hallmark.